In my earlier work and life I was sure of what was right or wrong, black or white, and the best or worst way to do everything! I was a confident judge. What I didn't know at the time was that judgment was my enemy!
Not now! Life has imparted some wisdom to me and I now know that whatever I perceive is nothing but an illusion.
My understanding of every situation is only a small part of the whole truth. I only see a small subset of reality and therefore will never know the whole truth.
Many people develop competencies as they grow up and as a result they advance in their careers. And yet, at some stage of their life they may find that what served them well in the past causes problems today. That's exactly what happened to me.
Are you experiencing something similar? Maybe you're holding onto some outdated beliefs. Or perhaps a behavior that worked in the past doesn't have the same effect now.
Maybe a personality strength has become a liability when interacting with people possessing the opposite personality strength. The end result is poor or dysfunctional interactions with employees, subordinates, superiors, and loved ones at home.
What can you do? If you recognize yourself in this description, and feedback indicates that change is necessary, you have a choice to make. You can either take steps to change your future, or you can hold tightly to your past behaviors and beliefs, and continue to experience the negative results.
How to Choose A Better Future
Past choices, good or bad have created the life you are experiencing today. If bad choices were made in the past, then you are experiencing some stress and distress in your work and life.
The opposite is also true. Previously made good choices, will manifest themselves in a positive experience today.
If you want to start moving toward a more positive life, you'll need to make some changes. In order for the past to not control your future, you must release it. In other words, you must completely forgive transgressions of the past and live each present moment in a way that will create the future you desire.
Make no mistake; it is very difficult to admit to yourself that you were wrong in your judgment of past transgressions. What is the hardest initiative of them all?
Understanding that no matter what happened in the past and how you felt about it then, that it need not create your future. You can release it, approach the now in a more productive way, and enjoy a much happier future. You must swallow your pride, admit you were wrong, and look at situations with new eyes.
Your past judgment of right or wrong is not important. What is important is your choice and what you do in the present that creates the future.
Apologize for past transgressions (whether you feel you are right or wrong, it doesn't matter). Clear the deck. Forgive totally not to remember ever again.
Start over with a clean slate. In that way you build a new foundation to create the future you desire with the people in your present. Those people can be your significant other, peers at work, supervisors, friends, or any other person you interact with.
The important thing is to build healthy, positive, collaborative relationships with all those wonderful people with whom you meet, work, and live. Try it, you'll like it!
Author Resource:-
Joe Farcht is the founder and president of Leadership Advantage, Inc. His purpose for living is to develop and coach leaders, executives, managers, and supervisors to new levels of performance and success in their work and life. He is the author of the book Building Personal Leadership: Inspirational Tools & Techniques for Work & Life. Learn more at Leadership Advantage, Inc.. Please contact Joe at joefarcht@cox.net or at 602 996-1802.
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